Maybe some have heard or known but maybe some have not.
I hang my boots as a stay-at-home mum and picked up my heels again to be a working mummy.

Yes I did! After 20 months being at home. That's how old Radiah is today.

So for many SAHMs who welcomed me back then, it is time to bade me goodbye as I leave the boat.
But I pray you will not label me as a traitor to my children. For leaving the children behind in the hands of caretakers while I earn my dollars and cents.
I pray you do not look at me buying gifts for my children as an act just to appease them.
I pray you do not look at me as a woman who prioritize money over the well-being of the children.

But to be honest, I do not actually care about the label put upon me. Because only I know my intentions and I will only do what is best for my family.
I am a mother and a wife before anything else.

I have been on both sides of the world. Being a working mom and being stay at home mom.
I love being a working mom and I love being a stay at home mom. I am a woman and naturally I am fickle like that.

But in honest truth, whether working or not, I would love to have my kids by me 24/7
Is that possible?

Well I thought so.

So after I delivered by third sweetheart, I waved goodbye to the organisation I was working with for 5 years, determined never to return. Then I picked up my passion I built 10 years ago. I was telling myself 'Ahhh.. now I truly have the time to build whatever I would love to.'

So I continued trading which many ladies are doing today. Buy low; sell high. The cutting edge will be on the number of following and your own marketing. I know it is not easy but I thought since I already had a head start over the decade, why not? Every road surely has its challenges but I figured I got it.

Not how I would imagine it to be though.
I thought with my own office I was able to launch products and work from the comfort of home. Easy isn't it. Mail outs every 2 to 3 days in a week. Reply to customers at the comfort of my bed or while bringing the kids out for play.

Again to cut long story short, I thought it was easy. I thought so.

I underestimated being a stay at home mom. Ok wait.. there is a difference being a stay at home mom with a maid and without a maid. I was a stay at home mom without a maid. Of course the level of satisfaction is different but there I have my children asking for me from the moment they open their eyes till the time they close their eyes. Sometimes at night with their eyes closed also they can still call out for me.

I probably:

• change 10 to 15 diapers a day.
• Go into the showers up to 12 times a day (2 of which are mine).
• Prepare food like every other time.
• Make 15 milk bottles everyday.
• Get the laundry is done everyday.
• Iron everyone's clothes
• Send Rania to school.
• Check on her school work
• I am a person who must make my bed everyday including mopping it. 

There were so many things which I wanted to do for myself and I couldn't do.
But yes, I slept a happy woman. I sleep every night with pride and knowing that I took care of my cubs. I was there at their every fall. I was the one making their milk every time they are thirsty. I know the kind of food that goes inside their mouth.
Being a stay at home mom means I get my 10-min power naps in the cab or when the kids are having their afternoon naps or just anywhere.

During the 20 months which I was at home, the family did alright. Of course financially we were not as lavish as before. It was a sacrifice. Still I felt there were times were still able to eat nice food and kids still get their toys. I am so glad that my children are not very picky. During crunch times, $2 toys from Daiso make them happy.

Until we explored into a business adventure and explored it beyond what we thought was capable. That was when things took a downhill.

I would not say I suffered a loss or my own business suffered a loss. Whatever that I went through, the whole family went through with me. I probably felt so wrecked ad exhausted beyond words. It took me many months to recover financially and be on my feet again. It was not just financially that impacted me. It impacted me psychologically, mentally and I was drained.

Still, I was very lucky.
I was lucky that my losses took me only a few months to regain me back on my feet. I was lucky that I had people who believed in my intentions. I was lucky that I had many loved ones who told me that I would come out from this experience with greater maturity. It was definitely a lesson to learn and remember.

Like I said, whatever impacted me, impacted my family as well.

So I sat down one day and thought through the whole idea of being a stay at home mom.
Was I able to do with less? Not eating out most times? Not going out as much as I would like to? Take the buses and trains more than the cabs? Not buying any bags? or shoes? Not even getting myself new clothes?

Yes yes yes yes yes....

I am a very simple lady. Simple-minded as well.
During this stride, I learn a lot about humility. It pains you when people think you are unable to afford some things in life. It pains you when people puts you at a level below them.
But I have learnt to take the bullet. Swallowed the bitter pill.

I told myself it was God's way to teach me humility. Well, the lesson was a long time.
Long is subjective. In my case we were not looking at months. We were looking at years where I had to bite the bullet.
But after a while I got used to it.
I smile at during those instances. Because I know life is a wheel. I was up. Then i came down.
Today may be your day. Someday, my day will come. I kept my faith.

My husband always say my level of tolerance is very high. But I always reminded him that it is not up to us punish people or put them in their places. We leave it all to the Divine One.

My heart was very heavy to return back to work. I discuss this with the husband and he being the awesome one, he said he has no right to make me return to work because the responsibility to feed the family was him. Not me.
But I shared with him that the economy is on a downturn and we would not know what the future would hold for us.

Of course I had my breaking points. I had moments where I questioned God and His Intentions (which is awfully wrong to do). I wondered how long more. And those were also the times where we got our greatest test from the business ventures we did.
There were many payments we did not receive. Commissions we were not paid. We were shortchanged for the work we did.
But that was business. It was not like a 9 to 6 job which quantifies for $x every month, no matter how little or how hard we worked. Business is a risk.

Still, those who did what they did, I only prayed to Him that He took care of my family. My children especially, for they did not understand anything which was going on. I made sure they were carefree as much as they can be.

Hence, despite all that, I thank Him for the health he gave my whole family. I thank Him for the solid rock marriage I was in. It was a gift.

I took my last straw.
I consulted a close family friend and asked if I should go back to the working world. It was a short and simple question, to which I was given a short and sweet reply. "Yes."

So I finally swallowed the fact I was going to bid goodbye to my SAHM title. I worried a lot about the children. I wondered if they could go through the days without me.

Within 2 weeks, I secured a role. Again in the IT industry, after 11 years, that became my second passion. Well, I didn't think I was going to be selected. There were probably 40 of interviewed (or more). 4 selected. I was one of them. It was mind-blowing.
I was crying in happiness. I hugged my eldest daughter and she said, "Come siblings. Give mummy a hug. She got a job."

Funny thing, when the husband asked about my remuneration, I laughed and I said,"I have no idea."

3 weeks into the role now, alhamdulillah things are settling down. The whole family is getting into a regime and the children are so adaptable. I totally underestimated them.
Radiah did not ask to be breastfed during office hours. Riduan is so well-behaved. Rania stepped up to take care of her other siblings. I am so blessed.
The moment I stepped into the car, greeting everyone, that is the time when I immediately hear squeals, shouts and cries all at the same time. I will always smile.

Nothing beats coming home to the family. In life we all make sacrifices.
It is important to remind yourself that the sacrifice we make need not be the same as the others. While other mummies sacrifice being a SAHM, there are mummies who sacrifice by heading to a 8-hour job. Sacrifice is never quantifiable.

Am I pleasing myself for the fact I head back to work? No.

As I always say, keep the intentions right and let Him pave the way for you.



I know who I am.
I am a mummy. A wife. A working professional.
This itself is fi sabilillah.

Vagisil - Everyone's bestfriend

This should be everyone's best friend.
Well, it has been mine for the longest time! 10 years maybe! And I really want to share this with my readers.

For many years I have with sharing it with my lady friends and mummies but they seem to give me that 'ARE-YOU-SURE' look. I really cannot help but to give them the 'CAN'T-YOU-TELL-IM-SERIOUS' look in return.
Well, it all started when many ask me what was my secret to having flawless skin.

*cough*cough*

I do not have flawless skin. (Happy now?)I have a slightly an uneven skin tone and dark eye rings which I have to thank my genetics for that. Yes, dark eye rings can be genetic and I had mine confirmed by a doctor.
But I have to admit that I do have almost zit-free skin. I used to have a T-zone issue - long time back.

Of course Vagisil is popularly known as a cleaning liquid to wash and clean our lady bits. I always wonder why they have these products because we were taught since young to wash with soap during showers and during visits to the toilet. Nonetheless, I share with the ladies that I use it as a facial wash.

YUP. FACIAL WASH.

Ok, are you going to give me that face again behind the screen?

But truly, this is the one and only facial wash you will ever going to need. I am not a fan of skin solutions because I think they are overly expensive and I really do not have the capacity, be it time or energy to cleanse my face, use tons of cotton wools and toners which are overly drying to the skin. What more moisturisers. Gosh! I hate going to sleep with a sticky face.

So everytime I wash my face in the shower or when I need to take my abolution, I always do it with a 20-cent coin size of Vagisil. Wash it over my face and it cleans make up! Of course for waterproof ones, you need probably about $1 coin size of Vagisil. As for me, I only use foundation, eyebrow colour, eyeliner, blusher, sometimes a little mascara, rarely lipsticks which will be gone after a meal and too lazy to reapply again. So the make up washes off in a jiffy!

Why Vagisil as a facial wash?

1. It works on all skin types.
Vagisil is pH balanced so it is really useful for acne prone skin. As for me, I no longer have T-zone skin. In fact, it will not even leave your skin dry because of balanced pH. So really, this is truly a cheaper option to the many facial wash that you have been trying.

In fact, there are some of Vagisil formulation that contains probiotics and can help to clear up blemishes.

2. It is nicely scented.
I swear upon this. It is awesomely fresh yet sweet smell which is a bonus on top of the clean feel you have on your skin. Of course you can opt for the unscented version.

3. It is hypoallergenic.
I am allergic to 1001 things and when I knew that this formulation was hypoallergic, I was so delighted to use it without much thought.
It is really meant for delicate skin isn't it? Well, why not for the face.

4. It is way cheaper than your bottles of your skin care.
That I need not explain any further.

I am sure the gentlemen will have some reservations using them. Well, if you have a wife, just squeeze out some for yourself. She would not know the different. There is a large amount of love to be shared. Typically a bottle can last myself(only) for 2 months or so.

If you have yet to be married, well, just transfer it to another clear bottle. No one will notice.

Well, there was a day when I was home with the 3 kids alone and preparing lunch. I was happily cutting away the chilli and a couple strands of hair was tickling my nose. Without thinking, or more like a reflex action, I pulled those strands of hair away. Within moments, I felt the piercing heat from the chilli on my nose and cheeks.

I was panicking and had no idea what to do next. The pain was getting intense. I went to the toilet to wash it off and contemplated to apply some toothpaste on it to cool it down. But when I entered the toilet, I saw my facial wash aka Vagisil and I washed my whole face with it.

Trust me, the pain and heat subsided and I felt very clever. Vagisil is pH balanced, hence it neutralises the acidity of the chilli on my skin! Tadaa!

Someone I knew has eczema and when I shared with her about the pH balance of this, she used it as her shower gel. Apparently, she shared that it didn't dry her skin and she felt like the wash didn't rip her off her body moisture!

So ladies, if you are still wondering which facial wash can serve you best, I hope you will give Vagisil a shot. I'm pretty sure it can be love after first wash!

My 37-week Journey

I find a terrible sense of urgency to write up this blog entry. Everything was in a state of craziness for the longest time that I was too exhausted to blog, despite missing in writing.

On 19th January, me and the little girl inside hit 37 weeks! Technically we are full term and baby girl can be popping out anytime.
Oh yes, I have been having ALL the pre-labour symptoms since a few days back. All of it!
So mummies, if you are getting an SG50 baby this year and will be in my shoes soon, here are all the symptoms that you might have.

1. Backache
In this 3rd pregnancy, I have the worst backache ever! It doesn't help that I am making 2 to 3 trips to the toilet every night. Getting up from bed after sleep is a chore. I will be walking like an old woman to the toilet.
I am not as mobile as I would like to be during this pregnancy. I love walks. I can go for walks but now, I will have to take a 15-minute break to rest my back after a long walk. To kick off the walking pace again would also be a chore. But me being me, I really cannot see myself sitting down and resting at home. I feel so.. so... useless.

2. Leaking
Hahahaha.. I leak ever since my first pregnancy. It is and will never be the same again and we all have to live with that in exchange for the beauty of pregnancy and seeing an adorable mould coming out from you.

I used to think sanitary pads are meant for those times of the month. Oh well, not for me.

3. Contractions
Oh yes! I started having Braxton Hicks pretty late into the pregnancy. Sometime around 33 to 34 weeks. That is considered late for me because my children have a habit of coming out 3 weeks earlier than due date. But, this time around, my pre-labour contractions are the most painful among all my 3 pregnancies. I am beginning to think that I am getting old.

It's always tempting to go to the hospital and see if it is due, especially over the last few days but I had to hold back. There was no regularity in the contractions. Then again, I never experienced that. In my first pregnancy, my water bag leaked and I was induced. In the second pregnancy, I was dilated and I was induced.

I faced real contractions delivering Riduan because my epidural wore off. I remembered tearing in pain begging for more epidural. So until i reach half that stage of pain, I will hold off the hospital visit.

4. Cramps
I probably have not had my mensus cramps in the longest time. Since Feb 2013. That makes it almost 2 years when I conceived Riduan, breastfed him and conceived the third child. But yes, it was all coming back to me now.

5. Pelvic Pressure
This has been my accompanying friend for the longest time. When my bladder is full. When I walk. When I bend down to pick up things. My baby girl was already head down at 33 weeks, so this is really no surprise.

6. Baby 'drops'
This too I experienced earlier in the pregnancy, when I was about 34 weeks. Suddenly, I can walk longer, breathe better and laugh harder! I thought it wasn't so obvious, but everyone seems to be noticing it too.. so I definitely can't go wrong.

7. Diarrhea
I am a constipated person by nature. No amount of vegetables can help me with this because it is just what iron does to me. So instead of going to the loo once in every 3 days, I am doing it 3 times a day now. And it is very different feeling.

8. Stop gaining weight
Just a week ago, I lost half a kilo and baby gained 600g. So that makes me 1.1kg lighter.
I would think this is partly due to the change of diet I have since I am controlling my sugar intake and also my new regime of taking the organic apple cider vinegar which helps with weight loss. I also follow the chinese tradition of drinking long bean and tomato juice for diuretic purposes. It's nice to feel lighter despite carrying a rice sack weight in front.

9. Nesting period
This time around, my nesting period kicked in very very much later. Maybe at 35 and 36 weeks or so. I wait for nature to take its course.
But when it came, I was arranging my baby's clothes, re arranging the laundry area and my kitchen. I even am having half the mind to clear up my store. Lol!

So to sum up this pregnancy, I really did not have the best of times (though all makan cravings have been checked and satisfied).Work had been obsessively demanding, creating a lot of unnecessary stress. I had a difficult time keeping Her Closet in regular momentum. I come home late or exhausted that I get too tired to spend time with Rania and Riduan. Not a single date with my husband till I was on hospitalisation leave.

It was also the time when we moved in to our home in Ang Mo Kio and my leave was not cleared. There was no way of settling down. Till today we are still trying to settle down. Then, there were other home issues which made me and hubby taking up a lot of time to normalise for the family.

Hopefully 2015 will spell out a better year for us both and for the family. Here is the journey of my pregnancy for through the 37 weeks.

At 11 weeks, during Eid, still have the urge to wear heels.



15 weeks



16 weeks



18 weeks



20 weeks



23 weeks
I think I look the best here. Not too big. Not too small but well, it was not the end of the journey.



24 weeks



26 weeks



28 weeks



30 weeks
I begged Alfi to bring me to KL to have my feast before I got heavier and could not manage the two kids. It was not an easy trip but we survived!
We booked a hotel at Westin to make it easier for us to head down to Pavillion. Basically we only stayed at B1 and eat and eat and eat.



31 weeks



32 weeks
Some thought I was pregnant with a boy because I did not grow as wide as a girl pregnancy.



35 weeks
Diagnosed with gestational diabetes, it was hell till I found a remedy and resumed the joy of eating again.



36 weeks
Still 0cm dilated during the check up.



37 weeks
The final stretch. Met the gynae at 37+3 days and was already 2.5cm dilated so we scheduled an induced delivery the following day.
I am not a person who can live with anticipation nor someone who would be calm with surprises, hence the willingness to be induced through normal delivery.



Pregnancy has always been a joy for me. To know that I was given the opportunity to carry a little one inside me is a gift. To know that the little one carves out another milestone for the family is too precious to let go.
There is only so many times a woman can go through pregnancy - biologically. So every one is memorable for me.

The target was 5. We have hit 3, past half way mark. I do not have many more chances and the clock is ticking.
If He gives, we shall embrace. That's all I would say.

Till the birth story of my little princess.

I am watching you

Being a mother for almost 3 years, I still go to work with a heavy heart every single day,
I can only count a handful number of times when I leave the kids with my mom or sis so that I can date the husband.
I want my children everywhere with me. Even though it is tiring. Even though I am pregnant with my third baby.
And I have this habit that I do not like to bring my helper when I head out. I prefer quality family time.
I prefer to be doing everything. I prefer the non-existence of a stranger.

I think not many can understand or adopt my style. But that is me.
My family is exclusive to me.

I have to admit my weakness is my paranoia. Especially when I head to work and leave the kids behind with the maid.
Which mother would not right?
It heightens for me when I have my own place to stay and I need to plant a seed of faith that my children will be taken care of.

Alfi always knows how to calm his wife. So off he went to get a home camera for me to view the kids from work.
He fixed up the camera. He help me download the app, set up the account and all I needed to do was just to launch the application and I am a happy mommmy!

I am really appreciative of such things, really.

This is the camera he bought and we only placed one first in the living room. The camera can rotate about 270 degrees and comes with 16 hours recording.



Details of the camera can be found here.

So go get your hubbies purchase this for a peace of mind. We bought it for $199 in Challenger but it is really worth it!







The picture could have been clearer but I picked on a lower resolution so that the streaming is faster. It could also take pictures while you watch.
The best of it all is that I can call them from my iPhone and watch them on my phone at the same time. So it is very heartwarming to actually see how they talk to me on the phone.

Work still continue as usual as I plug my earphones to hear what is going on in the house and at the same time I will be able to see movement in the living room and kitchen. I can even hear how many time Rania sings her 'Let it go' songs.
I will know when the maid should switch on the TV, or make sure Rania is not standing too close to the television.
If they are not in the living room for a long time, then I will call to check where they are and what they are doing.

There is a speaker function when I can call out for the kids or the maid just by talking through the phone. But I will not do that unless in case of emergency and the helper needs attention.

Many asked me if the maid knows that I installed a camera to look at her. Again I left that to Alfi.
She has no clue!



Apparently, he made it look as it we placed a long item on our bookshelf. So glad I married an engineer.
Haha!

So ladies, go get a home camera and get a peace of mind. It is priceless!

Eid Mubarak

Since my late dad passed away, celebrating Eid was no longer the same.
I came to a point where I am just going through the motion. Deep down, I silently envy those with full family pictures.
I wished I could have that framed up on my wall. But I was nowhere close.

I never experienced celebrating a Eid with a full set of grandparents.
Neither did my children.

It's fate and undeniable but nonetheless, it didnt stop me from feeling that way.
So no matter how I tried to cheer it up, it is never the same. And it doesn't help that Alfi doesn't enjoy celebrating Eid either.

Now I can only depend on my own little family of four to have a complete picture.
Otherwise it is will never be complete.

Wishing all my readers and Her Closet customers Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri.



I am not a very small person by nature and many always wondered how I can fit into a baju kurung every Eid. I will share those details with you ladies very shortly!
This is a must-stay-tune-and-read-post.

The next few days will be a hectic time for me & family. I will be shifting back to my home. It has been two and a half years since I left the place to stay with my mom and since the family is expanding, it is a good time to move back and have our own space.

Though only 13 weeks into pregnancy, my nesting phase is already here.
Maybe because of the shift.

Everyday I search for ideas on how to design my tiny 5-room flat where resource and having children is a constraint. Now that it is no longer myself and Alfi, I have to consider how I am going to arrange utensils and food stuffs in my kitchen, what colour of furniture do I purchase, what furniture would be child-friendly, what kind of rugs do I buy and what kind of curtains/blinds do I select.

Engaging an interior designer will be expensive, especially with a growing family like mine where I spent $600 on diapers and milk alone, I need to be smarter in managing the family's finances.
Well, stay tuned too to see how we unfold settling down in our new space.

I hope time is on our side that we can have a small gathering at our home towards the end of Eid.

xoxo

Life is always a struggle

There was a period of time in my life, just recently, where I suffered from a burnt-out.
Alfi said I needed to focus and probably I will get things done. In a way, when he said that to me, I was a little upset.

I know he meant well, always giving me the motivation because he knows my limit is never to put myself a limit.
I am famous for pushing myself which I think I got that from my late dad.

I tried managing and dividing my time nicely but somehow things do not work like a clockwork.
With a family, 2 kids and a job, there is always something cropping up at the undesired timing.

I would plan to do Her Closet mail outs every morning before work and then head down to the office.
Lunch and then head home. Dinner, chill, settle the kids and when they tuck in, I will work on Her Closet.
Weekends are allocated strictly for tuition in the morning with the rest of the day strictly for family.

Sounds easy.

In reality, it isn't.

There can be instances where the kids are not well. Or I have an early morning meeting offsite and cannot do my mailing. Tuition has to be shifted because of family commitment. Orders cannot be replied because the moment the kids sleep, I will be right next to them sleeping.

Even on weekends, everyone seeks your time that it is very challenging just to have some nice time with your own family of 4.

So it is tough.

I was so burnt out that I made a plan. A plan to quit my corporate job and focus on entrepreneurship.
Alfi is a business consultant who advises a lot of SMEs daily so he is a free asset to me and I thought with my passion and his guidance, we would make a good team.
Plus, I had it with work. There was no work-life balance at probably the salary I am getting. Work had its own issues and it really pulled me down.
All i wanted to do was to go home and see my children because they never fail to lift that huge burden off my shoulders.
I enjoy giving them their evening showers, play with them, make them milk, wash them with every dirty diaper and at the same time, making sure Alfi had everything he needed to make himself comfortable at home.
It made me feel like a SUPER Mom.

So on 28th June was the day I had planned to 'throw letter'. I am so confident that I would make it on my own with tuition/enrichment classes, Her Closet and blogging. Social media is my forte and I knew with the focus, it could work much more for me.
Alfi & I sat down and calculated the risks and advantages.

It seemed like a very good plan. Send out my resignation letter, serve my one month notice and it was time to move back to my home in Ang Mo Kio.
It would be a fresh beginning for me and the kids. They would wake up to see me every morning. To date, Rania still wake up crying at times but always looking for me every single morning. I had no heart to bring myself to work (though when I am at work, the brain works differently)

But I was very geared up. I shared these plans with some close relatives and friends and they were very supportive.
For me, it was not an easy way out. It was a plan I thought was wise. A plan better for the family.

Come 28th, Alfi was in Hawaii. I called him to say if it is ok to 'throw letter'.
He told me to hold it. His instincts have always been right so I did not question (though I really wish I could but I was not in to spark off another baseless session).

I held my letter back.

I held my letter back but everyday I question what was in store for me. It did not take me long to find the answer.
We believe He is the best planner of our lives. So I have learnt to accept and move forward, keeping the valuables things in life close to my heart.

I always smile when I see the siblings interact with each other. How they would play (rough most times and I will rarely mediate).




How we our lives have changed so much just by having these wonderful gifts from Him




And most of all, I love how my children cling to me like I am their lifeline.
Nothing beats the unconditional love I get from both of them.




Life is always a struggle and a never-ending challenge. It will never change.
It is a promise for us on this Earth. But I am always so thankful of the gifts, the mercy and the love He gives me.

It makes my journey more bearable.
Much more bearable.

Shoot & Snap

I have been a very good girl. I have kept my hands together when it comes to gadgets and 'toys'.
The last expensive item I bought for myself was a Surface RT which aided me at work and is very helpful if I need work to be mobile for me.

But recently, I have been getting a little cheeky and stretching a bit of my dollars in view of being 'productive'
Thanks too with the support of Alfi because he knows my passion for photography, blogging, social media and running my baby business.
So while he does not get to fully enjoy gadgets, he just needed to hear from me the return of investment purchasing an item and then he comes onboard the excitement.

Yeah, we are just suckers like that.

Last month I made a purchase for Shttr. It is an inexpensive purchase actually and I think after this, a lot of selfie addicts will get a piece of this.
For USD$40 with a small stand and free shipping, Shttr is a very slim and lightweight camera phone shutter connected via bluetooth.

Its awesome to be able to take photos more comfortably. I need not tell my sister to hold the phone while I press the shutter.
Yeah! Now you know!

Having a group photo is also easier!


To really know what a Shuttr can do for you, here is the youtube video you can watch but be careful NOT to fall in love with it.



My Shuttr is in white. What will yours be?



Alfi was off to Hawaii for a week and of course there were a lot of stories to share when he came back.
I suspect he is not done with his stories just yet but one of the things he shared was that he saw someone using the Sony QX-10.
He was just explaining to me verbally how it looks like and what it can do and I was like,"You serioussssssss?!?!?"

Within 2 days (at least I let him recover from his jetlag) we were at the Sony store and in under an hour I came out smiling!!
I was initially so keen on the Canon Powershot S120. It was a no brainer since I am a Canon fan and my previous point-and-shoot was a Powershot S95 before it was caught drowning in my handbag filled with 1.5L of water.

Sony QX-10 was more affordable and when I bought it last night (yes, just last night) I managed to get the casing (so happy that it's blue!), 2 micro SD cards and 1 mini tripod (which I surely will convert it into a mini monopod!). The whole package was just $349.
Can you see all the heart shapes on my eyes?

The flexibility of taking the picture with the camera, or the camera attached to the phone or doing selfies and videos. These data files goes straight into your phone and to your social media in a flash!!!

This was the picture taken with studio lighting. The picture definitely looks wonderful.


Here are those taken under normal light.







Available in 2 colours, I was so undecided which one to choose!



But the salesperson said white was a winner. Lucky I picked that. Look how the colours of my gadget now matches!



To many more selfies of me and me and me with the kids!



Go check it out!

I missed you!

Indeed I miss writing on this blog. This blog keeps my sanity in check, I swear. So I kinda lost some of my sanity now.
I missed my readers. I used to get a few emails/watsapp/facebook chats but those have reduced over the months.
Thanks to my work schedule which is more hectic than ever and also to the previous helpers I had which didn't help me at all.

Riduan is turning 7 months now!
How time flies and there is not even a birth story about him. Trust me, I do plan to have that written out, if you still like to read it.
Nonetheless, I will still have it blogged soon because it is not fair that Rania has a birth story and Riduan doesn't.

Life as a mother of two now is so different. It is challenging but surely rewarding.



Their smiles, their antics - its really one of a kind.
Insya Allah to many more blog entries to come over the next few days.

This is just to kick-off the long silence.
I am not going to stop rattling off.

That's for sure!

Pack that bag

Unlike the daily bags, I am always more anxious about the hospital bag.
At 33 weeks, I started packing my hospital bag and this time around, the bag is different from the bag that we packed for our firstborn.

This time around we did not only have mummy & daddy's list.
We had a list for mummy, daddy, Rania and baby.

Mummy's list:
1. Vanity wear (the comfy ones of course)
2. 2 sets of clothes (one to wear in the hospital in case I refuse to wear the off-beat maternity dress and one to wear home)
3. Thermal socks (something I wear throughout my stay in the delivery suite and also during the hospital stay)
4. Toiletries
5. Slippers for use in the toilet & hospital
6. Tumbler to keep my drinks warm or cold
7. Milo 3-in-1 & other sachet drinks

Daddy's list:
I did not interfere.

Rania's list:
1. 1 set of PJs in case she wants to stay over with Mummy.
2. Bottle detergent
3. Baby Blankie (dual use for my breastfeeding as well)
4. Diapers
5. Wet wipes (only because she cannot use the Pigeon wipes provided by KKH)
6. Small towel

Baby's list:
1. Go home outfit

Then I have a hospital handbag which I IG-ed earlier.



1. Microsoft Surface Tablet
2. Book of Zikir
3. Tissues (wet/dry/antibacterial - kiasu much?)
4. Bag of medicine
5. Bag of wires - tablet charger, USB wires, power bank to recharge my phone
6. Wallet & Maternity Medical Book.

To all the mummies-to-be, hope this helps!
Wishing you a wonderful journey as well.

xoxo

What to expect at 37 weeks: The delivery plan

This will probably be my final entry prior to delivery.
On the 9th Oct, I went in for my regular check up and my gynae wanted to check if I was dilated.
The past two check-ups, I was 0cm dilated. Even when I was going to deliver Rania, I was 0cm dilated in the delivery suite.
I believe my cervix is so hard that it refuses to open.

Which explains the 36 hours in the delivery suite with Rania, 2 Pitocins and intravenous oxytocin which only made me dilated 3.5cm after stretch.
Without being able to handle the rhythmic contractions, I finally opted for epidural.

4 hours later, I was fully dilated and 4 pushes later after crowning, Rania made her parents cry with her first cry.

So this time around, I was expecting the same. So when the gynae put her hands deep in, she looked stunned.
She said,"You are already 2cm dilated. You want to give birth today?"

Ok wait... what? I am dilated? Give birth today?
I was not mentally prepared though the hospital bag was.
So I said no.. let's do it naturally but the gynae warned it was going to be anytime.

We set another appointment on the 16th Oct to induce the baby out if nothing happens along the way.
I was thinking,'Man that sure won't happen. I'd probably come back before that.

But that didnt happen too.
I had regular pain. My contractions come and go. My backaches and tailbone gave me hell.
Sleep is no longer in my dictionary.
For a constipated person who heads to the loo once every 3 or 4 days, I am dumping it every day at least once now.

All signs of pre-labour but the labour didn't come.
The anticipation got so high with Alfi & I but eventually we decided, 16th it shall be then.
I would not hold it in any longer because I have become pretty much immobile and my little boy is already 3kg from the last time I checked.
He made a record of putting on almost half kilo in 3 weeks!

His big sister was only born at 2.565kg!

So while waiting for the little boy to pop, I have been on hospitalisation leave.
Resting as much as I can.
I have been sleeping a lot these days, especially the past couple of days, as if the body knows that it will go through labour soon.

But Alfi and I are also spending a lot of time with Rania before she gives up the title of being the only child. She knows that her days are numbered and getting more and more clingy each day, as if she is going to lose her mummy.

So all our attention currently is with her













She is becoming a big sister soon!

We also managed to celebrate Alfi's birthday with all his families. Something simple and no-fuss, just the way he likes it.
A lot of us anticipated I will give birth on Alfi's birthday but then again, that didnt happen.





So today will be spent a nice quiet family time. Just the 3 of us before mummy checks in to the delivery ward. I would not know how long will it be till all is over but do stay tuned to my VC Page for delivery updates.

So till the next time!

xoxo

What to expect at Week 34, 35, 36

Writing a 3-week update will be quite a lengthy one.
Here was me at week 34. Still glowing in pregnancy.



In a way, I am glad my arms and hips did not get any bigger though everything else did.
During my 34 week check up, I was suspected of gestational diabetes because the sugar levels since Hari Raya was still seen in my urine.
I was awfully nervous.

Within the next day, I was asked to come back for OGTT.
Oral Glucose Tolerance Test
It required me not to eat and drink for 12 hours and I had to be in the clinic by 9am.

Upon arrival, they took my blood and you know how phobic I am with needles. Worse, the husband was not around to give me that physical support.
After the blood test, I was asked to drink what it seems like a 500ml laxative drink.
So sweet and a lot.

The moment I finished the drink, I was light-headed and the stomach didn't feel well.
Still no food and drinks.
I wanted to vomit but the nurse did not allow me to do so because it would nullify the whole test.
Waiting time - 2 hours.
It was a terrible two hours.

I was lucky I brought the maid with me to help take care of Rania while I cringe at the sofa in The Private Suite.
2 hours was up and they took my blood test again.
I was very eager to get it over and done with.

The minute it was over, I was in search of food like a glutton.
Still the whole day continued with me heading to the toilet to shit and a tummyache.
Later that evening KKH called me up. I was nervous to the bones!!!
Alhamdulillah all cleared!!!

So I went on my hooray mood with my foodie again.
Here was I at 35 weeks.



Rania is becoming extremely clingy to me.
She refuses anyone if I am around. She makes it very hard for me to clean her up in the toilet.
With everyone else, she gives them an easy time.
Doesn't she realise that mummy's tummy is getting huge!!?!?

Entering 36 weeks, my stomach was huge huge huge.
There are some who still wonder there are twins in there. Oh well, as a mother, don't you think I will be the first to know.



It is heavy and I wont bluff you.
I would like to believe that I weigh more water than fat but we shall see.
I have passed the 90kg mark and weigh more than when I was pregnant with Rania.

The boy too at this my 35th week check up weighed as much as his elder sister when I delivered Rania at 37 weeks.

So other than the weight gain and sugar in my urine, all went well.
Now at week 36, I started to have dizziness and didn't think much about it. I thought I was just looking up and down too fast.
Come my check up, my BP shot a high of 150/94 and there was protein in my urine and my sugar was rated 4 out of 4.
That was super high.

My gynae only checked if my cervix was open.
Still closed.
I was immediately put on a wheelchair and wheeled to the delivery suite. I was a nervous wreck.
It was my first check up without Alfi and Mum and Rania was with me.

The nurses quickly ran a fast drip into me and took blood samples.
Needles at the delivery suite are always nasty. They are not only long but the needles come with tubing and for someone who is so scared about needles, I wonder why I allow myself to deliver again and again.
Don't we all mothers wonder?



So now I am on hospitalisation leave for 2 weeks which my gynae estimated I will deliver.
She is not only an awesome gynae. She is awesome with giving MCs and hospitalisation leave.
Not a very friendly gynae.
She was not my favourite when I was pregnant with Rania but when I saw her on the job delivering Rania and how the nurses and even the doctors are scared of her, she became my #1 choice.

I will be seeing her again in a few days time for another check.
My stress is about completing the tasks at work before I head off for my maternity leave, my orders which I still have quite a bit more to do.

In the next post, I will share how I planned out my delivery and my holiday bag.
So if you are a mummy-to-be, stay tuned.
Who knows you can pick up a tip of two :)

xoxo