I am so exhausted..My toes are aching cos i walked a lot today.
Apparently, i wore the wrong shoes. My working shoes. Not that it was a problem before but I am more used to slippers now.
But i supposed beauty and pain lives side by side.

Despite the fatigue, I am at ease now.
I am probably blogging with my eyes half closed and my make up not removed.
But it's okay cos MY BABY'S BACK FROM RESERVIST!
Goodness! i think it was ages since i last talk to him.
So now, i can look forward to my late night calls(just when i got used to sleeping alone without the phone) and he'll wait till i start snoring on the phone cos that would be a sign that I am asleep (duh!)
I can look forward to his many messages and phone calls and we can talk and call each other at any time of the day.

Goodness I've missed him so much!

Baby and me planned to send Ena off at the airport when she was going to leave for Aussie. I made plans to meet at the airport and he made plans to come and hug me so tightly when he sees me.

GUESS WHAT?!?

Apparently Ena left for Aussie a couple of hours ago and Baby fetched me at Newton. Already I felt bad leaving mom alone in town, HE WAS LATE! *urgh!*
So, when i got in the car, guess what he did?
He just smiled and smiled and smiled and let out a short shriek.
THAT'S IT!
wahahaha..
oh.. that always and I mean ALWAYS happen..

Anyway, since we were late, I called Ef and said that i was going to take a cab from town, head down to her place and then to the airport.
So there she stood at the pavement, waiting for the cab to come, only that it never did.
wanted to surprise her with baby's appearance, only to be screamed 'banyak kau punya taxi!'
And then she ignored me totally for a min and talk to Rizal
*humph!*
I felt so outcasted
*lol*

It felt so nice seeing Rizal again, having him near me and knowing that it is back.
It is a wonderful feeling.
Indeed
He talked about his camp. This time i really didnt do much talking cos he had so much to say.
In fact, i think it is not over yet.. he might just continue later tonight.

We brought up the topic about the wedding, looking at the datelines that is drawing near and probably as much as we have decided on the preparations, there are many other things that we cant overlook. Sensitive issues. I want a comfortable life after the wedding still and we are still in the midst of working it out. I hope to spend the Hari Raya with him this year. It would be very nice. but as much as i want to get married, i need to make a wise decision first. i have many things going on for me now.
Time is a definitely a factor.
Its like i'm in a rat race.
If i postpone the wedding, its because i need to work out my own things.
nothing personal.
but i know that if the wedding's postpone, i would definitely be mocked.
Many more stories will surface.
Some would think they are only excuses.. But its ok.
Whomever, whenever or wherever i am going to marry, don't think should be of anybody's business. I wish i could just tell some people to stop "worrying" about my wedding cos they can never be too sure if the are among the lucky 350 guests.

Think about it,..
But as much as dad wants me to marry much later, I don't want to be 27 or 28, unmarried and unsettled.

I think my eyes could no longer take it anymore.
my contacts getting drier
and I wanna talk to my baby.
-smile-


***
I used to kill people for money.
But because you are my friend,
I will kill you for free

-Yours sincerely-
***