It's December alright!

Yes, I remember writing a blog post on Hello November and now we have reached December.
That is how fast I feel my time has passed.

It means mom & Lil' Sis have gone and returned from their 2 week holiday in Europe.
It means that this weekend I will permanently move over to my new house, though it is not fully furnished or we have yet to unpack. In fact, we are still packing from my mom's house.
I have 21 years of things to pack.

It also means that Rania has reached her 34th week mark and my tummy keep bumming into everyone everywhere I turn.
It too means that she has 3 more weeks to go before she is full term.
I have been alert with my body and starting to see signs of pre-labour and it is really fun to engage these kind of conversations with the husband.

He told my parents that he saw pregnancy in a different light now.
The miracles of God and the joy, pain and agony that he see me go through.

I have been very forgetful lately.
I do not know where I put anything and everything.
The husband is very patient with me and I really cannot be more thankful.

I will forget my phone when I drop off somewhere that he will have to park the car and look for me instinctively.
I will forget that he needs something from downstairs and when he asks for it, it is not in my hand.
I will forget that I left some things behind and he will drive at 1AM to look for it for me while I ransacked the whole room and clean up at the same hour, something which they said was the "nesting instinct"
I even forget my meetings!!!

I swear I feel very shitty with myself.
Not helping that my maid is boiling my blood all the time. It is really pointless having her around if she cannot help and pretend blur and at the end of the day, I do a better job on my own.

Shitty, angry, frustrated and I will just burst out because I have been a very prompt person.
Snappy, agile, multi-tasker and quick witted.
In short, I was in control.
In perfect control!

Today, if I read Business Times, I probably take 1.5 times longer to complete and article.
I feel like banging my head on the wall, forcing it to think.
Not wanting to blame myself, I got frustrated with pregnancy though I kept telling God that Rania is a gift I will uphold my responsibility.

There are nights where I am so tired but hate to sleep because I am so immobile.
Sleeping on sides hurt my back. There is no more the 3-point turn which I whined about making.
It is now a 5-point turn and each turn hurts.
Each turn, the husband will need to support my back. Each time i get up, the husband will need to reach out his hands to me to pull me up.

I have friends who told me,"Mima you make me scared of pregnancy after all you wrote on the blog. I start to disbelief whatever the rest of the women wrote about how beautiful pregnancy is."
I laughed.

It feels good that I can get messages across but I knew I had to be fair.
"Some have had easier pregnancies than me. I was excited about pregnancy until reality hit me so maybe those ladies who may be in my position were just brainwashing themselves so they can go through it. But you know what? You HAVE TO try it!"
I am that cocky!

My feet has been swelling like crazy. More on the left side.
So we were out to find more comfy shoes for me.

Look at the number of pairs I have to try before I come to the perfect size.



Thanks to the husband who sponsored 2 pairs of Crocs. My first 2 pairs ever.



Still, the only shoes which can make me walk for miles will be Fit Flops! I swear!
And you can never have enough Fit Flops!

Still, the crocs will come in handy when I have given birth and I need to take care of Rania.
I MISS MY GOD DAMN HEELS!!!
(of course I miss my body)
Trust me the only one who is complaining is me and never the husband.

May Allah bless him and the marriage that we have today.
I really really really cannot be anymore thankful.

Up next will be Love Letter #3 and our staycation (a very new word to me) at Marina Bay Sands for our 1st year wedding anniversary.



p/s: Hope you truly enjoyed my whining! <3 xoxo